We welcome summer in with happiness and optimism at whats to come. Coming out of our series on Marriage & Relationships and looking forward, we still hear and see many who do not understand the what the struggles with mental health means and how demanding and dominating it can be on ourselves and those whom we love. Some of us are alienated by those who we considered friends and others are pushed back into stigma.
Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife, an LDS relationship and sexuality coach with a Ph.D. in Counseling Psychology, discusses how we all want security in our lives, marriage, society and often in religious beliefs. Often the “rule” becomes the most important thing, which then creates tension and frays our freedom and structure. Instead of allowing honesty and courage to drive us, we resort to making others happy, which causes us to fracture.
In this second part of this episode, (part 1 here) with our returning guest Elisheva Liss, we dive into the controversial topic of the benefits and challenges of making our partners and children aware of the fundamentals of relationships and the taboo topic of sex awareness. Often, religious or community obligations and accepted practices encourage young people to marry, and often without providing the tools to a happy marriage. Expectations in physical and emotional relationships are followed by disappointment, marital distress and divorce, leaving us to ponder what went wrong. Nowadays, the notion of commitment is mocked like an outdated religious construct and Elisheva suggests we take the time and patience to educate children, when age appropriate, and on an easy to understand level, that people experience love in different ways as a much needed preparation for relationships, so as to avoid misinformation and missed expectations later on in life.
In part 1 of this 2 part episode with our returning guest Elisheva Liss, we discuss the views shared and seen by ourselves and society regarding divorce. Elisheva is a licensed psychotherapist whose training is in marriage and family therapy, and also treats individuals and couples. Sometimes divorce is necessary and sometimes the topic is broached because of frustration and stress. When working it out for legitimate reasons becomes impossible, the stigma and perception may be too much to bear. Still, giving it another shot at making peace is often the best option if not only to be certain that you gave it your all and face regret later.
As Hope to Recharge completes its 3rd year and 200th episode, we take a moment to recognize past achievements and accomplishments and give gratitude to those who helped reach this milestone. Although the journey of healing was treacherous and laden with the possibility of defeat, we continue to discuss and practice the essential tools that allow us to move forward each day.
In part 2 of our episode with attorney-turned-Imago-healer Igor Meystelman, Igor shares the nitty gritty of how Imago therapy works, explaining and drawing from his own journey and experience from the dialogs with his wife. Imago relies on the fundamentals of human behavior and our deep and innate desire to grow and form healthy human connections.
As an attorney, Igor Meystelman saw many couples pursuing divorce. In his own personal life, after a fateful and explosive conflict with his wife, he discovered Imago Therapy, which helped his conquer obstacles in his own marriage and exponentially strengthen the bond between himself and his spouse. Despite his career aspirations, he decided to take on learning the skills needed to become a Certified Imago Facilitator to allow couples seeking divorce the alternate option of reuniting with Imago therapy to foster rehabilitation and spousal harmony.
Aliza Bulow, a returning guest, shares the path that led to her conversion to Judaism with us, an in depth conversation about finding belonging in our community, and her love, respect and trust she shares with her husband, despite his late in life rejection of their religion. Aliza previously shared her journey through her son’s depression and eventual suicide in two previous episodes.
Coming back from Passover break, we catch up on Matana’s journey, and the internal changes seen over the past few weeks. May is crowned National Mental Health Awareness month, but is it enough to just have it marked in a calendar? Growth and appreciation are a constant and required focus to continue along the journey of recovery and noticing the little details are a critical tool to developing a healthy gratitude mindset. Awareness can be fickle if it isn’t well defined and intended for long term internalization.
As Matana faces different hectic life events, she navigates from important to more important. Often, we neglect important items for things that are more important, and that’s ok. Feeling unaccomplished or missing out on goals can often lead to disappointment but we need to also focus on downtime. Critically important for maintaining proper mental health, taking the time we need to reflect, relax or focus is also needed for continued energy.