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Today’s episode is about a very special and difficult topic that is a struggle for me to talk about. When I heard Erin Bagwell share her perspective on her experience with Postpartum Depression (PPD), I knew I had to have her on the show. In this powerful and raw episode, we discuss our own experiences with mental health in early motherhood and what new moms often go through.

All emotions are valid in motherhood. People make it seem that joy is the only acceptable option. Motherhood is hard. No one tells pregnant people that it’s not all going to be sunshine. It will be stressful. Mothers often feel strong bouts of fear, sorrow, rage, helplessness, loneliness and other difficult emotions. Many struggle to connect with their babies. There is a spoken and unspoken expectation that they will love every minute, leading them to feel that they aren’t allowed to be honest and reach out for support. Those with Postpartum Depression often deal with even more serious, threatening feelings such as the desire to kill themselves or their baby.

Making your own choices is valid. Neither Erin nor I had a positive experience with breastfeeding. We felt we were expected to do it, but it did not go well. I came to the conclusion that if possible, breast is best, but really, a healthy mom is what’s truly best. A Baby needs to be able to bond with Mom, and it is harder to do so when Mom is suffering from extreme anxiety or depression. If breastfeeding is causing that, logic says it is best not to breastfeed.

Erin has just released a new film documentary about her journey through Postpartum Depression: Year One. She began creating the film before she even realized she was dealing with PPD. She was mad that no one had warned her how hard motherhood would be, and wanted to personally process what was going on with her and her daughter. It turned into a much bigger project, one that we can all now view and share (free) on social media. If you have dealt with Postpartum Depression, know someone who has, or just need a new perspective about the struggles of early motherhood, you definitely should watch this film.

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Connect with Erin





“It also felt like it had nothing to do with my little girl. My love for her was there, but it was hard to figure out how to express and how to make a life together.” @ErinBagwell @MatanaJacobs #HopetoRecharge

“When everybody was telling me to enjoy every moment, it made me feel like I was already failing.” @ErinBagwell @MatanaJacobs #HopetoRecharge

“Don’t be thinking it’s Postpartum [Depression] just because you’re having a hard beginning. Most beginnings are hard, and no one talks about it.” @MatanaJacobs #HopetoRecharge

“I had to hold on to the idea of hope, to the idea that the sun would shine, and I didn’t know if it was there or not; I didn’t know if it was going to be, or if this pain would continue.” @ErinBagwell @MatanaJacobs #HopetoRecharge


Topics Discussed

  • Normal motherhood blues vs Postpartum Depression
  • Joy
  • Healing from Postpartum Depression
  • Motherhood
  • Breastfeeding
  • Emotions in motherhood


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